Archive for the ‘brandon’ Tag

my best friend’s wedding   Leave a comment

For the last 7 1/2 years, I have been one of the luckiest girls in the world.  Now I say ‘one of the…” because there are many of us who have been blessed to have Brandon as their friend.  And on Saturday, June 25, 2011, Brandon made Stephanie the luckiest of all when he became her husband.

It’s nearly impossible for me to explain to you just how special Brandon is to me.  I can tell you that he is truly (one of) my best friend (s); however, he is also a brother to me.  He’s been my confidante; walking partner (around OU); drinking buddy; and, from the beginning of our friendship, he’s been the person I turn to when I don’t feel like being around anyone (else) yet don’t want to be alone.  He’s my Brandon.  And now he’s also Steph’s husband.

I cannot figure out if I’m happier for Brandon for finding a wonderful lady in Steph; or Steph for seeing my dear friend for how A*MAY*ZING he truly is.

silence of the heart.   Leave a comment

We search for happiness everywhere, but we are like Tolstoy’s fabled beggar who spent his life sitting on a pot of gold, under him the whole time. Your treasure–your perfection–is within you already. But to claim it, you must leave the commotion of the mind and abandon the desires of the ego and enter into the silence of the heart.

~ Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love

The walk home from the hospital on Tuesday nights always reminds me of Athens, OH: My College Town.  The side streets, loud bars, and one particular 4-way intersection, which I always hope to be abandoned so I can create my own diagonal crosswalk, all bring along a welcomed sense of nostalgia.  It’s the little things in life, kids.  Believe it or not, I used to be one of those college kids in the loud bars (on my beloved Court Street) on Tuesday nights enjoying 25-cent wings, 2-dollar mixed drinks in plastic cups, and a priceless buffet of OU-loving friends.  But that was a long time ago…well, five years ago.

I look forward to that walk so much, even going as far as to turn down rides home in order to have those 20 minutes to myself.  No cell phone. No email. No to-do list. No stress.  Just me, my city, and my nostalgic mind on a romantic walk home after a soulful night of baby therapy.  What more can a girl ask for?

Surrounded by a city of millions and thousands more tourists, silence is a rarity in Chicago.  However, I’m learning that it’s not impossible.  Although silence in terms of noise- or lack thereof- is what many first think of, it is silence of the heart that this girl and many others find themselves looking for something- whether or not we actually know what that something is.

A mere stranger once said to me, “I hope you find what you’re looking for.”  At twenty-years old, I didn’t know how to take those words.  What did he see in me?  What did he think I was looking for?  How did he know before I even made this realization? 

During these last seven years, I never stopped to hear the silence.  Too caught up in finding something else, I overlooked what I already had.  Believing that I had to be better, grow up quicker, and become somebody else, I lost sight of myself…except when I walked the streets of Athens.  Usually with Brandon or other friends at times, the streets provided me serenity as I was able to leave the commotion of my restless mind and abandon the desires of my dreamer ways.  I miss those walks.  I miss those run-down streets.  I miss Brandon and his perfect companionship.  I miss Athens a lot.  I miss it even more on Tuesday nights when my nostalgic mind kicks in as I turn onto Fullerton.

I cannot tell you the last time I spent a Tuesday night in a bar, and in a few weeks I’ll be back in Athens for the first time since June.  And while I miss those days dearly, I’m okay with it now.  Because for 20 minutes each week, after I finish my volunteer shift, I can count on my heart to fall silent and clarity to fill my mind.  I can take a deep breath and know that everything is fine.

hot.mess…minus the hot.   Leave a comment

Today is not my day.  Yes, there were certainly some ‘YAY’ parts to this Fri-YAY, as in FB chatting with Brandon and my lovely phone date with my beloved Darlene.  But unfortunately I could neither drink enough coffee nor find one more table to paint to turn this blahness into some thing resembling a smile.  My apartment is a mess and therefore I, too, am a mess.  Does anyone else feel that way or am I just turning into my mother?  Seriously though, whenever my apartment is torn up (as has been the case since this whole bed bugs epidemic struck a mere few weeks ago), I tend to breathe that messiness into my being.  Unfortunately this mess of an apartment isn’t going away until it needs to be for the arrival of Jen & Matt next week.  Now that’s the kind of “YAY” I like for Fri-YAY.

Forcing myself to stay in tonight, I’ve spent the past few hours going back-and-forth between trying to come up with a post to write and painting second coats on my now black night stands, end tables, and desk.  Unfortunately this writer/blogger has been more productive with the painting, which is probably obvious as you read this rambling of a post. 

I don’t know.  Maybe I should just surrender and call it an early night…which is probably a good idea with tomorrow’s early wake-up call and (potentially) late night out with the girls.  Okay, Friday, January 7, 2011…I surrender.  You win.  I lose.  But I’m bowing out gracefully...

and taking one of the loves of my life, Hazel, with me.  If only I could.  I miss this little girl so much.  I’d give anything to be able to cuddle up with her right now and watch Leave It To Beaver or even Elmo.  That’s how much I love & miss her!!  And Georgie too of course, who is now walking.  Seriously, I need to get myself back to Cinci to see all my kids- including Hazel & George.

Good night, kids.  Hope you had some ‘YAY’ in your Fri-YAY, and if not, then here’s to hoping our weekends are much more enjoyable.  Tomorrow is a big day for me and yes, there will be lots of coffee.  Let’s just hope it works its energy-boosting magic tomorrow.  Pingers crossed.   

Song of the Moment: What Do You Want From Me by Jerrod Niemann

i had the time of my life and i’ve never felt this way before. and i swear this is true, and i owe it all to you. (part two)   Leave a comment

Before I knew it my cell phone alarm was yelling at me (to get up). 8:00 am never felt so early in my life, but I guess that’s what happens when you (attempt to) sleep on a bus the night before and go to bed around 3:30 am the night before.  Knowing that a morning workout would come in handy before the all-day drinking festivities began, I changed into my workout clothes (forgetting deodorant) and headed to the hotel’s workout room.  A twenty-five minute run is all I was able to commit to as I discovered that my brother, Nicky, and his friends were only a 30 minutes away and my unshowered-self was far from ready to greet them.  Somehow, thirty minutes later I was at least somewhat presentable and hugging my brother in the hotel lobby.

I took the boys to breakfast while the girls got ready, and immediately upon finishing Ashley & Jay were pulling into the parking lot.  Yep, I knew this was going to be a go-go-go day for yours truly…but in the best possible.  With a little switch-a-roo, I found myself taking Jay & Ashley for a much-run Starbucks run and breakfast at North Market.  Then it was back to the hotel room to gather the rest of the troops and finish getting ready to head down to OSU campus for tailgating. 

Now thank goodness my friends love me so much 🙂 because they did not like me when I mistakenly told them that it was “only a 25-minute walk to campus”.  Technically it was…for me once.  But unfortunately since moving to Chicago, my barrings for Columbus have been a little skewed.  Sure, it was a 25-minute walk for me one time (I swear) but I guess I wasn’t sober and didn’t realize where I was walking from and to at that time.  Note: Both points were closer than our departure and arrival location.  Again, Oops!  Luckily they were good sports and didn’t ridicule me too much – nor all day long.  Right guys?  O-H well.

We eventually made it to Little Bar to meet up with the others- Kristin, Jim, Carrie, and Tony (for starters)- and a load of OSU fans.  Let the shenanigans officially begin!  There’s just something so magical about Columbus- and Ohio in general- during the Buckeyes’ season and being on campus for the game is unfathomable to anyone who has never participated themself.  It’s days like this that make me realize why I love Ohio so much!  I was so happy.  Sure, I was drinking my Red Bull and vodka, but that wasn’t the reason.  It was truly because of the people who I was surrounded by: Friends & family (Nicky) from Hampton, Friends from OU, Friends from Columbus, Friend from Chicago.  All of these different parts of my life were gathered in one place…FINALLY.  One of my friends said to me, “Don’t you love when your friends like one another?”  My (obvious) response, “Yes! Absolutely!”  That may have been the first time ever that I had so many parts of my life together in one place.  It’s actually something I’ve always hoped would happen. 

We headed down to River Jam, close to the stadium, with Jim, Kristin, Carrie, and Charlie before these season ticket holders had to head in.  We took in some people watching and more drinkingI have to say that I love a tailgate that serves Bloody Marys!  After kick-off, I received a text from my third cousin, Ryan, that he was in the vicinity.  So I immediately made my way through the crowd of OSU fans and found him.  How adorable is he? 

We made our way back to Little Bar to meet back up with Ashley and Tony, and my friend, Jacquie- who is a Child Life Specialist and introduced me to the career in the first place.  Thanks so much, Jac!!  Although the bar was now ridiculously crowded (with the game underway), we found ourselves having a good time.  New friendships were forming before my very eyes and therefore, I was in my Ohio Happy Place…and it was just about to get much happier.  

Brandon!!!  Now this is my happy place.  Being with one of my best friends in the entire world, Brandon, makes me the happiest girl ever.  I mean, seriously, how cute are we together?!!  This is definitely one of the loves of my life.  The only thing wrong with this picture is that Libby is not in it with us.  This was the first time I saw B in 1.5 years!!  That’s horrible.  And even worse, I haven’t seen Libby in 2.5 years!  That needs to change ASAP and hopefully it will in the next few weeks.  Note: Brandon, Libby, and me (BLK) were a little three-some (like that, B?) in college. 

Seeing Brandon was definitely the cherry on top and seeing his fiancée, Steph, was a bonus indeed.  Everything was great.  Maybe a tidbit overwhelming, especially with the drunken crowd, but definitely for myself enamored with so many of my friends by my side.  I’m a very lucky girl. 🙂  And with my friends-now-friends, well everything was pretty A.MAY.ZING. and the most amazing thing is that the night was far from over. 

We were hungry.  Hungry and exhausted.  But the show must go on.  This was the weekend where us 26 & 27– year olds gave it all that we have to give to suffer through the lifestyle of a college kid again.  Tough, but somebody has to do and who better than a bunch of OUers and our adopted-OUer, Stef, to do it?  Afterall, this is what our OU degrees were for, right? 

Getting back to the hotel, I encountered my brother and his friends.  I’ll skip the details but a little drunken entertainment certainly went on with one of my childhood neighbors.  (Poor Joey.  Poor Us!)  But this did allow me to spend some (more) time with my brother and gave Ashley the chance to harass him with the camera.  At least we got this lovely family shot in.  Then to make it more of a family gather, my wine-induced father decided to drunk dial me (at 8:30 pm).  Yep, I love my family!

We were all beat at that point, but it was my friend Charlie’s birthday and therefore it was time to rise and (attempt to) go again.  Off to Park Street Patio, which is definitely was always a favorite bar of mine when living in Columbus. Unfortunately it’s changed a bit, but that most certainly does not mean that we didn’t have a good time.  After all, it was Charlie’s birthday and that definitely calls for some celebrating.  With Jim taking charge for one of his best friend’s birthday, we knew it was going to be a good time.  But this little (cougar) blogger of yours had no idea just how good- and interesting- it was about to get. 

Let me first say that I was not drunk.  I really wasn’t.  Drinking?  Yes.  Tired?  Absolutely.  High on life by spending two full days with my friends in Columbus?  You betcha!  I’m saying this because I honestly have no idea how the events that occurred on Saturday night at Park St. Patio unfolded.  One minute I was dancing and singing at our table and the next walking around the bar trying to find Jacquie.  Then I was scouting out boys with Kristin until I had to go outside to take a call from my friend, Elise.  And that, my friends, is the last moment before Little Stella Cougar Got Her Groove Back.

So I’m still a little unclear of what actually happened, but I’m beginning to put some of the pieces together.  Apparently, Jim found out who the cute guy near the bar was and maneuvered his own plan (with the assistance of our server) to get him (Nick) to talk to me (?)… meet me (?)…honestly, I don’t know what he was trying to do.  But it worked and that’s all that matters.  And what was Jim’s grand plan?  Based on what I gathered and experienced, Mr. “Matchmaker” Comyns ordered me another Screwdriver, had the server get Nick to come over to Jim, and then Jim asked him to take this drink over to a “really nice girl who was talking to his wife” (me).  And he did- which honestly still shocks me.  I mean what would you do in that situation?  The funny thing is that I probably would do it, but I’m not sure how many others would.  I think that says a lot about the person Nick is.  To be quite honest, little picky me has to admit that he’s pretty A.MAY.ZING.  Just a good, genuine guy.  In a way that could be detected by the way he handled the situation.  I think it’s fair to ration that I had a good time with him.  Am I crushing?  It appears that I am.  So yes.  Interesting enough we discovered that we have a (random) mutual contact, Nila, who thinks the world of him.  If anything he’s reminded me that there are good guys out there…even at the bars. 

So yeah, that pretty much concludes my weekend- without too many details on the latter part of Saturday night.  (We’ll see what happens.)  Sunday morning brought about the end of our roadtrip to Columbus, as Stef and I boarded the Megabus (minus Starbucks) back to Chicago.  We had a decent ride home, which is always appreciated- especially on a Sunday night (aka the day before a Moan-day).  It’s been pretty much a continuation of the go-go-go weekend these past few days (minus the Columbus, friends, and boy parts) and not much sleep has happened for this girl.  Case in point, it’s 11:22 pm CT and I’m nowhere near asleep.  Maybe I should hit “Publish” and get at least one step closer to that occurrence.

So again, thank you to Columbus and all of my friends- old and new- for leaving with many memories from this weekend.  I’ll see you all again soon!

drop everything now…meet me in the pouring rain…kiss me on the sidewalk…take the pain away.   Leave a comment

Standing on the platform in Evanston waiting for the Purple Line last night after work, a chill came over me.  All I wanted was someone to put their arm around me.  Is that asking too much?  I tell you this because after having that thought, I immediately had another thought: That’s not typical for me. 

Sure I would have loved for  that someone to be a cute, single guy that likes me best in grey sweatpants and no makeup, but honestly I would have taken the arm of one of my girlfriends, lovely gay boyfriends, or family members.  Someone’s arm around my shoulder, letting me know that everything is going to be okay.  Or perhaps, just showing me that someone is there beside me.

Friends of mine all over the country- mostly in and/or from Ohio- are struggling and I strongly dislike hate that I cannot be there beside them with my arm around their shoulders.  Wiping their tears.  Showing them that there is still beauty in this world and that our friendship is one example.  Instead I am restricted to using my words through emails, Facebook postings, text messages, phone calls, and greeting cards to comfort them in during these rough and never-ending frustrating days. 

Aren’t the Terrible Twenties glorious?

A message from Julie yesterday broke my heart and actually brought tears to my eyes.  A few weeks ago when I visited her in Akron (for less than 48 hours), I was able to hug her worries away.  But now, once again I am resulted to using my words to warm her sad, lonely, and confused heart.  My heart breaks just thinking about her now.  As depression seeps into her soul, I cannot physically shield her.  I cannot drag her on spontaneous trips to Meijer like we used to do when we both lived in Columbus a few years ago.  I cannot accompany her on a day-long hike through the middle of nowhere Ohio until she finds peace in nature.  I cannot spoil her with a sushi date nor laugh hysterically while watching the ridiculousness that is Where the Wild Things Are.  I just want to put my arm around her and tell her everything is going to be okay. 

Adriana has been struggling lately with a laundry list of issues that I wish would disappear at the snap of my fingers.  She’s only been in my life for over a year now but I honestly cannot remember life before her name.  I laughed with irony when she calls me her “little human xanax/prozac”.  Even though we both know that the other is there for us when she cannot be there, it just isn’t always enough.  Fortunately are written exchanges can compensate during our anxiety-ridden days but there’s nothing better than curling up together in our OU sweatshirt blankets with tea/coffee/hot chocolate sharing a bag of Twizzlers.  Fortunately, we get to do that soon when I venture out to Cinci next week (!), but I’m still wishing that I was there right now…forcing her to soothe her worries with my heavenly Starbucks and companionship.  I’ll be there soon, A.  Very, very soon!

I think of Alisha a lot, especially since her life is paralleling mine from (gasp) 6 years ago.  She’s nearing the end of Fall Quarter at my alma mater, Ohio University, and is beginning to have the never-ending questions surround life after graduation exhausting her weary mind.  Having worn those shoes and overcoming the struggles myself, I am honored to give her encouraging words from the lessons that I learned.  However, it’s not enough for me.  As her “Big Sis”, I want to be there to shield her from the negative thoughts, doubts, worries, and fears.  I want to carry her when she feels too weak and too tired to spend another day questioning what’s next?  I want to sit with her at Alden Library; drink coffee at Donkey; buy her a shot of liquid therapy at Red Brick and Cat’s Eye and The Pigskin.  I want to take her to Libby’s and my secret bench on South Green that helped us work through our own problems and walk her around the back streets of Athens as Brandon and I did when we needed a listening ear.  I want to show her that she will get through these tough times and that I’ll always be there to remind her of so.

And listening to Taylor Swift’s new song, Never Grow Up, I thought of Rebecca and her lovely little Hazel.  These lyrics led me to sending the song to Rebecca, indicating that I smiled think of their mother-daughter relationship, as well as the impact Hazel has on me: 

 I won’t let nobody hurt you, won’t let no one break your heart; And no one will desert you; Just try to never grow up, and never grow up

Rebecca responded with such gratitude, stating that this song put things into perspective again as she’s been run-down as the Terrible Twos continue to hit their household.  I am so happy that I am actually, physically able to be there for them next week!  Though as I feel with all of my friends, I want to be there for them all the time.  Through words I constantly tell Rebecca how much I admire her and how she inspires me to (maybe) become a mother one day.  But I want to show her through a hug, a smile, a girl’s day of pampering how much her family has impacted my life.  I want to be there beside her to take away her stress and remind her to enjoy all the little joys that Hazel and George bring her life and all of ours.

Going back and thinking about yesterday when I was waiting for the train, maybe I didn’t necessarily want someone to put there arm around me.  Perhaps I wanted to put my arm around someone else.  Isn’t that more likely for me?  Afterall I’ve been thinking about all of the people- more than just the ones mentioned above- that need my support these days.  Maybe I just wanted one of them to be beside me, to put my arm around them?  I don’t know.  Remembering that moment, I definitely wanted an arm around me.  Perhaps I’m finally ready to let someone be there for me?

Dating back to my teenage years, I’ve struggled to find people who I could trust and really open up to.  All of these friends that I praise in my blog posts- the four above being included- have really helped me breathe again.  They’ve showed me that not only can some people be trusted, but that I need to be able to confide in others to be by my mind; to let them put their arm around me.  One day, hopefully sooner than later, that arm will belong to a cute guy that does like me for me.  Flaws and all.

a dream is a wish your heart makes   Leave a comment

I had a dream…last night.  There’s no real significant, earth-shattering proclamations to come out of my dream, but it definitely had me thinking about things during breakfast this morning.  It was my wedding rehearsal/wedding day- you know how dreams blur all the details together- and the wedding was taking place in Cleveland.  Which is definitely never going to happen in real life IF this girl ever ties the knot.  However, I must give my dream-filled mind credit for the rationale behind the location because it was 2 hours from Pittsburgh (my hometown) and 2 hours from Columbus (the groom’s hometown). 

Now who was the groom?  Now that’s a secret I’ll never tell.  You know you love me.  XOXO.  Okay, I was watching a few episodes of Gossip Girl before writing this so forgive me.  The groom, although he never physically appeared in the dream, all the signs and acknowledgements indiciated that it was ‘him’…the one and only guy I’ve ever even thought twice about marrying.  His friends & parents were there, as well as mine- and even random people from my past were there in attendance.  From what I remember, Libby was my MOH and Brandon was maybe in my wedding party too.  Also at the wedding were my Make-A-Wish colleagues.  I remember introducing them to the other guests and sharing that the groom was working for the Cubs.

So let’s recap.  I was getting married to my dream guy; working my dream job, and from the sound of it, he was too; living in Chicago (still); and I was getting married in Cleveland.  Okay, 3 out of 4 dream scenarios really isn’t that bad.  I mean do you understand why I didn’t want to wake up from that dream?

But I had to.  Actually I had to wake up fairly early for a Sunday because today was another Make-A-Wish volunteer day for me (!!!) at the Oncology Child Life picnic at the University of Chicago’s Wyler Children’s Hospital.  Today was another unforgettable day for me as I spent time giving children (patients and former patients), their siblings, and parents the opportunity to play, smile, laugh, and most importantly, forget their problems for a few hours. 

The happenings of today are special for me, and I have to share that I’ve never received so many ‘Thank Yous’ in this city as I did today.  Gracious parents were just happy to see their little boys & girls being kids.  Sure some kids were healthier than others and a few kids showed physical signs of chemo, but I can tell you that not one of those kids showed signs of weakness.  It was their resilience that inspired me today…and tomorrow…many tomorrows.

You’re changing that boy’s life.  No, he’s changing mine. (The Blind Side)

The quote above popped into my head during the picnic and it’s still running through there today.  Being a volunteer for Make-A-Wish and Children’s Memorial Hospital are very important opportunities for me.  Instead of stating the never-ending reasons why I feel this way, I’ll stick to the relevance of the quote above. 

Since proclaiming my admiration for Make-A-Wish many years ago and sharing my desire to become a Child Life Specialist, I have been told by many  people how they “couldn’t do that” and “ohmygosh, that would be so hard”.  As I’ve said many times before and again to my mom on the phone today, I can do this.  I want to do this.  You’ll never hear me say that this is easy work…not once.  Instead you’ll hear me say that I am committed to serving these kids & families to the best of my ability, no matter what my role may be (ie. volunteer, staff, Child Life Specialist). 

“It has taken me 26 1/2 years to figure out what I want to do with my life, but now I know and this is it.”  Now that I know exactly what I want to do, my impatience is what’s getting to me.  I’m ready to start now.  While I’m thankful for the volunteer opportunities I’ve been allotted, I cannot help but hope to spend more of my time- all of my time- dedicated to what I strongly believe is my calling.  Like I’ve said, it’s taken me a long time to figure this out, and yes, I know I’m young, but I’ve also spend a long of wasted time dreaming of what I could do and now that I uncovered my real wishes, I want to turn them into my reality. 

“Everything happens for a reason,” as told to me by my new friend, Dina, today.  After opening up to me about her journey, as well as sharing that she is a CLS and Make-A-Wish employee, I told her that I know she’s right.  I’ve heard this phrase a thousand times before, but today I really heard it.  I know it’s true.  I couldn’t say it isn’t knowing that I’m sitting here tonight analyzing what I just wrote, about 20 months after taking a chance and moving to the big city.  Everything happens for reason.  But we also cannot sit back and hope that every good thing that we dream magically appears.  Fate only takes you so far and the rest is up to you to make it happen.

this one’s for the boys   2 comments

I spent part of my Friday night spinning the week away surrounded by roomful of boys (who like boys) and listening to boy band music.  Now that’s a great way to spend a Friday night!  However, during class I realized how I am (fairly) boy friend-less in this city.  The irony is that before I moved to the city, I envisioned myself  surrounded by [new] boy friends, like PJ in My Boys- which happens to be based in Chicago.  No such luck, or at least not yet.

Ever since I was younger, I’ve always been the boys’ girl.  I grew up playing soccer with boys on Cheyenne Court and in rec leagues.  In elementary school I was known to always have a few male classroom buddies.  Then came middle school, where I found myself mingling with the boys on the basketball, soccer, and baseball teams quite frequently.  And in high school, I don’t have enough fingers and toes to count the amount of boy friends during those four years.  If it paints a clearer picture, I finished high school by going on a senior trip with 6 or 7 guys…and no girls.  (Long story)  College was no exception either with those lovely boys of mine- with Brandon leading the troops as my boy BFF. 

In a very unarrogant way, I feel like the boys in Chicago are missing out not having me in their life as a friend.  And even though I complain about the crazies in this city, I am sure that there are some good guys out there that would be a great friend to me as well.  So come on out, boys!  Let’s play some cornhole and talk about your ex-girlfriend issues and crushes!  I’m so good at having heart-to-hearts with boys, so I promise you won’t regret my friendship!

Before I indulge you in the purpose of today’s concept, I’ll share this post that I wrote about the friendship between guys & girls: True or False: Guys and Girls Can Be ‘Just Friends’.  While I desire to have more boy friends in my life, for the rest of me life, I’m not naive.  I know that as we get older co-ed friendships are not as easy as they once were; however, don’t you dare let that stand in your way of great friendships.  I haven’t, and you shouldn’t either.

Okay, since I do not have the luxury of seeing my lovely guy friends every day and the boys in Chicago obviously haven’t caught wind of my expertise yet,   I’m going to use this post to advise the boys in blog world about the secrets of women.  Gasp!  I’m letting the cat out of the bag here.  Better take notes.  Seriously, you might want to.  Here are a few things that you need to know about women.  I’ll first say that yes, women are complicated.  We know this and we wish we could change it…but we cannot.  It’s in our blood, our DNA, and do you want me to get into PMS?  I didn’t think so.

As we get older, the situations tend to get more complicated.  The romantic  comedy scenario of Boy Meets Girl…Boy Loses Girl…Boy Gets Girl Back tends to have a few more dots in between the chapters; and sometimes that lack chapter doesn’t always take place. I think this is important to take into consideration when examining our own relationships- past, present, and future.  While we use our past as a guidebook, we all need to remember that no relationship is created equal.  Maybe that new girl reminds you of your ex-girlfriend, but don’t forget that she’s not her.  And you’re not the same person that you were back then either. 

What do girls really want?  Overall a girl just wants to feel wanted.  To know that you want to know how her day went; to know that you want to be there with her, and nowhere else; to know that she’s the only girl you truly have feelings for; to know that you’re thinking of her.  She wants to be a part of your life; to be friends with your friends- boys and other girls.  She wants those friends to tell her how much happier you are now that she’s in your life and that you really, really like her.  She wants you to want to be friends with her friends too.

She’ll love it if you bring her flowers just because; suggest staying in on Saturday night every once in a while; offer to have brunch with her family.  Send her texts or give her a quick call at night just to say good night, and the same in the morning to tell her to have a great day.

Girls believe in love at first sight- whether it really exists or not.  Girls dream about meeting the perfect guy in a coffee shop.  Girls fantasize about their wedding day- even if they cannot picture the ideal groom.  Now don’t go thinking we’re crazy; we’re not entirely.  I can explain it in two words.  Two words that you must never forget.  Ready to hear these two words: Romantic Comedies.  It’s a spell that was cast on us as a child to frame our perspective on love.  On behalf of all girls, please accept my apology.

Maybe girls aren’t as complicated because from what I know about (some? most?) boys, we all want the same thing (kinda?  sorta?).  We all want to be wanted.  We all want to be loved.  We all want to know that someone else thinks we’re special, that we’re worth their time, their energy, and their love. 

Now I’ve saved this for last on purpose in hopes that you’ll remember it.  It’s the most important thing that all women want.  The girl of your dreams, your soul mate, “The One”, your future wife…above all, she just wants you to be you.  Even though a girl will always be a fan of romantic stories, there comes a time when girls quit believing in fairy tales and start to believe in love.  So don’t worry about being Prince Charming.  Just be you.