all those times we looked up at the sky, looking out so far. we felt like we could fly…

I used to call myself a dreamer.  There really was no better way to describe who I was.  I used to spend my days reminiscing about past memories- and all those regrets in my childhood- and daydreaming about what the future held for me.   

I haven’t done much dreaming lately.  In fact, for the past year- maybe year and a half- I really haven’t dreamed at all.  Incidentally, I also haven’t done much blogging either.  I thought that I was just tired, or perhaps going through blogger’s block.  But since yesterday, I can’t ignore the facts anymore: I’ve been struggling with depression. 

Earlier this year I came out about my depression (and wrote a post about it), but to be honest, I never really stepped up and dealt with it… which is why I’m still not dreaming yet.

But I’m stepping up now.  Thanks to my wonderful boyfriend and a few supportive friends, I was able to say, “I can’t do this anymore.”  I really can’t.  I’m not going to sit here and share all of my struggles, because even though I’ve vowed to be very honest on this little old blog of mine, some things really are meant just for me and those closest to me. 

Although, that being said, I have a reason behind this acknowlegement: Please don’t hide from your problems like I have.  If you’re suffering from depression, please take my lead and find the strength within yourself (I promise it’s there.) to notify a doctor or psychiatrist, or even an understanding friend or family member.  Trust me, I know it isn’t easy, but you are certainly worth it. 

One more thing: So I haven’t really been much of a blogger for the past year, so this may not really come as a surprise.  But with everything going on (grad school, internship, studying, trying to have a social life) in addition to my struggle, I’m not sure how much I’ll be on here.  Initially I was going to announce an official leave of absence, but I’m just not sure if that will be the case or not.  So if this is the last post I write for a while- maybe a few months- then don’t be surprised.  But then again, I may be compiling a post in a few days.  Who knows.

But whatever the case may be, until the next time I feel the need to blog, take care of yourself. 

XOXO
K

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3 thoughts on “all those times we looked up at the sky, looking out so far. we felt like we could fly…

  1. ive been suffered from depression too. when i was in high school. nightmare… i know how does it feel… but i went to psychologist, i talked to my teacher, my parents and my dad bought me a dog. a pet can really help!anyway after graduation ,i went back to normal and even stronger&happier than before. i know how to deal with stress, i know how to deal with those people who hates me… family& friends will always be there. ignore stupid people stupid things.think about your family and lover when you are depressed. cheer up,i know its hard,but i am sure one day you will get through all these. good luck! again,thanks for your articles! love them! xo

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