lessons one can only learn from love by jillian harris

Just wanted to check in, but unfortunately time isn’t at my exposure today.  So instead I’m going to share this piece by Jillian Harris that I read yesterday-

You Can Only Control You

Well, the first important thing our relationship taught me was that we can never change other people and we are only responsible for ourselves. If you don’t trust someone, if someone isn’t dependable or doesn’t quite measure up when it comes to making you feel like a million bucks… chances are (I am so sorry to say) that won’t change. Us hopeless romantics cling to those stories of the bad boy turning over a new leaf and becoming prince charming but unfortunately bad habits are hard to break. And ultimately, it’s not worth worrying about changing the other person because as I said above, all we really have control over is ourselves.

It Takes Two

Another lesson I learned is that regardless of the direction a relationship is headed, it takes two. Whether a romance is headed nowhere fast or really growing in a beautiful way, it’s a result of two halves and their effort and work. There’s no way to avoid love being a two way street.

Pick Your Battles

Life is short and this person is supposed to be your best friend. Just when you want to snap back at your loved one, think about how you would react if it were your BFF… your reaction should be the same. Also, whether you’re the male or female in a relationship, if you’re going through turbulence, treat it like the first time you first fell in love: be kind, be sweet and be patient. Fighting is a losing battle and no one is perfect. And after all is said and done you can fight your way to be “right” but you can also fight your way to loosing a person you love forever, all because of your irrational pride.

Trust Your Gut

I’ve learned that no one in the world is worth losing yourself and your securities for. Turn off your heart for one minute and really ask yourself “is this person really able to make me happy?” You’re smart, and you’ve been blessed with instinct so always follow it. If you DO feel that this person is your one and only and able to make you happy then you can depend on a little patience, backing off and time to solve your issues.

**Give All Your Trust

The biggest thing I think I learned was how to trust. The thing is, trust is less about the other person and more about you and your emotional availability and confidence. If it turns out that he actually is untrustworthy you’ll find out in due time and know that you always did your best to support the relationship. Though it’s hurtful to have someone deceive your trust, investing and trusting people is always the right way to go because you’ll never get anywhere in a relationship if you don’t dive in 100 percent. So when it comes to trust in love I learned to give it all; you’ll come out in a good place either way.


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