capture it, remember it; but don’t hold on hoping to relive it.

So I haven’t been doing too well with dates lately. (And that’s putting it nicely.)  Besides knowing Max’s birthday (July 11th), I promise you that I hardly remember the day of the week.  But according to the desk calendar in front of me, today is Monday, July 18th.  How did I not realize it until now? How did I type it multiple times today and not recognize its significance until right now?

Last year on July 18th I wrote this post: we were both young when i first saw you. i close my eyes and the flashbacks startThose are the thoughts that composed my mind on this date last year, and now all I can say is, “Wow! What a difference a year makes. What a difference 8 years makes!” 

Although I can still vividly picture the moment that cute boy appeared in my nineteen-year old life, today I find myself embarrassed by how many July 18th’s I’ve spent wasted reminiscing about the past.  How many days within those years I spent holding onto his memory and foolishly believing we’d end up together- eventually.  However, more so than embarrassment I find myself relieved that I finally let him go.  I know this to be true because not only did I forgot to remember today’s date, but I also find myself questioning why I feel the need to write this post about him today.

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2 thoughts on “capture it, remember it; but don’t hold on hoping to relive it.

  1. As someone who knows this situation (pretty well), I can say with a smile that I am incredibly proud of the progress you made. Also, there’s no reason you should be embarrassed. You’re realization of the time spent on this person is merely proof that you have done nothing but grow 🙂 Keep that in mind, and always remember how A*MAY*ZING you are! All my love.

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