you can stand under my umbrella.

There are too many rotten things in this world, and if I can put a smile on one little girl’s face, one little boy’s face, then I’ve done my job.  ~ Tiffani Amber Thiessen

I love rainy days.  I love the sound of the rain on the window.  I love jumping in puddles in my rainboots.  And I love when the rain beginning dying down and I can close my umbrella and feel little raindrops on my skin.  But today wasn’t a rainy day, it was a torrential downpour.  And as I commuted both to and from work today, in the monsoon that hit Chicagoland, there were no windows as I found myself outside in the middle of it.  And while there were certainly puddles, there were soaken wet ballet flats on my feet instead of those rainboots- which were staying dry in my apartment.  And as for feeling the raindrops on my skin (and all over every inch of my covered body), that did happen while my umbrella was still up.

Sure I felt wet and horrible, and looked even more horrible, but I love the rain.  It’s so cleansing- literally- but also mentally and emotionally.  I always feel like some of my best thinking is done when I’m in the rain.  Today was no exception.  After a long day at work, I found myself with low blood sugar as I ran a few errands.  In between stops, my mind began wandering.  Soon I found myself thinking about all of the younger girls that have come into my life recently, allowing me to play the big sister role

You’ll know my little angel, Hazel, and my sis/(hopefully) future sister-in-law/Pen Pal, Alisha.  However, this weekend I was fortunate to spend time with my boss’s 15-year old daughter, Liz, and her friend, Tara, as they ventured to the city (from the ‘burbs) for their first unsupervised trip downtown.  Hanging out with them, I found myself remembering what my high school years were like.  (Not too lovely and we’ll leave it at that.)  I found myself in a big sister role, as someone who wanted to guide them through life and let them know that I’d always be by their side.   Isn’t that what big sisters are for?

It’s funny because I always wanted an older sister, but never a younger one.  I think I just wanted someone to guide me through life and let me know that someone was always there for me.  But now, I want to give others that opportunity that I didn’t have.   The world can be a cruel place- especially within those high school walls- and I just don’t want them to go through any of the pains and struggles that I experienced.  And if they do, which they probably will, I want them to understand that they have sidekick in life.  Someone who’s proof that the struggles make you stronger and that they are able to get through ANYTHING.  Those teen years can be horrible, and the years after are filled with confusion, so it’s always nice to know that someone is there to help you through it.

Having endured my own personal struggles growing up, I find that it is my duty to help others through theirs.  As girls, we constantly find ourselves with societal pressures and then we put pressure on ourselves.  I want to do whatever I can to make sure that Hazel, Alisha, Liz, Laura, Tara, and whatever other young girls become my ‘younger sisters’ in the next decades, feel like they can count on me and my strength to help them through it.  I want to share my own struggles and experiences with them so that they know I once wore their shoes too AND I overcame them.  I want them to that they can and they will overcome theirs. 

I cannot end this post without thanking the older sisters that have helped guide me: Darlene, Adriana, Ruth, Kristin, Sarah, Carrie, and now Dina.  (Just to name a few.)  All of them have helped me, especially this past year or two, and I am forever grateful.

Song of the Moment: Crazy Ride by Michelle Branch-



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s