It’s been a long week for me which I’ve been open up about in hopes that addressing the issue will help me overcome whatever this emotional torment is. Life isn’t perfect, but when is it ever going to be? Trust me, I know that. All that matters is that I feel better today than I did yesterday, and hopeful that the sun will shine a little brighter tomorrow than today. I need to believe that to get me through today…which is a perfect segue into the idea surfacing around my mind today.
Yesterday I had lunch with a girl I met through a M-A-W volunteer event that I did a few weeks ago. Dina is a M-A-W staff member here in Chicago, as well as a Certified Child Life Specialist. I know that she came into my life for a reason. It was a feeling that I had upon meeting her and yesterday I gained reassurance. I won’t indulge you in the details of our lunch date but Dina shared her story with me and proper insight based on those experiences, and hearing more about her journey impacted me greatly. Her path wasn’t easy either but she fought to get where she is today. Knowing that, on served as evidence that everything happens for a reason, which was the message that she left me with.
Everything happens for a reason. We hear those five words so many times over and over again. Sometimes we roll her eyes in disagreeable doubt; however, there are times when those words really touch us, and perhaps even inspire us. Yesterday was one of those times. I took those words with me as I spent the next few hours downtown with crowds of tourists. I thought about them realizing that here I was, living in Chicago. So many people dream of living here. They love this city. The same thoughts ran through my mind: Why don’t I? Why did I really end up here? Why am I still here? What’s the reason behind it?
We need to believe everything happens for a reason. That’s how I see it. One of the most exciting and scary things about is not knowing what comes next. Even if we think we know, it’s never a guarantee. Nothing is a guarantee. Here I am, almost twenty-seven years old and I finally know what I want to be when I grow up. I finally know what I’m passionate about with regards to deciding upon a career path. Now that I know, I want it to start now. I want it so badly. I’m doing some of it (in a volunteer role) but I’m selfish and want more.
I just want to be happy. That’s all I really want. No more anxiety. No more doubts. No more asking, What am I doing here? I want to show the world why I’m here…wherever ‘here’ ends up being. Even on my anxiety-ridden days, I know how much I’m capable. I know that I’ll be good at what I want to do…I just need the opportunity to show it.
I do believe that everything happens for a reason. I mean I wouldn’t be pursuing this career path if some things didn’t happen. Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. I believe that’s true as well, that things don’t always happen the way we’d like them to but that’s because there’s another path that will lead us along our journey. I, myself, need to believe that I’m approaching another unknown path.