it’s not you, it’s me…no really, it’s you

Target.  The best that ever happened to women and the worst thing that ever happened to our bank accounts.  As many people say, “I went in for one thing and came out with $100 worth of who knows.”  My friend Sarah, who lives in Bermuda…yes, Bermuda…complained that there’s no shopping in Bermuda and truly misses Target.  Are you allowed to complain and/or get others sympathy if you live in Bermuda?

Having this big, bad Bachelorette Party weekend to host for Julie and some of her friends, I made a necessary Target run this afternoon, planning to meet Karrie there a little bit later.  Hopping on the good old 76 Diversey bus, I made it there in good time.  Oh wait, let me add that I was still on my spinning high at this time.  In fact, minutes before I left my apartment I was definitely dancing and singing a lot to Gives You Hell (The Glee Cast version) in my plaid fedora (which I bought for such fun occasions- mostly in my apartment).  However, almost immediately upon walking into the Target (on Elston) my ‘life is wonderful’ mood not only disappeared, but a major anxiety headache took its place.  Seriously, I cannot remember a time when I didn’t get a headache at that Target. 

Since I’m trying to keep a positive attitude these days, I’m stray from complaining about the ridiculous that is the Target on Elston.  Well, maybe I’ll indulge a little by saying that it’s an absolute nightmare- far from the beauty and serenity of my lovely (most suburban) Targets in Pittsburgh and Ohio.  I don’t get it, Chicago.  Why do you have such shitty Targets?  Maybe it’s not far to blame it all on you, so why do you have such craptastic customers?  Seriously, major headache.  In fact, I still have one!

You know, I’d say it was just me if I hadn’t had numerous Chicagoans (all females and a Dusty) agree with me on this.  Therefore, I, Kristen Medica, have decided to have a trial separation from all of the Targets in the Chicagoland area.  I must reiterate that it’s a separation and not a divorce, and I can still see other Targets (other area codes/zip codes don’t count afterall).  I just think that it’s best for me that I give myself some space…fortunately, there’s online shopping and a few Pittsburgh & Ohio trips in my future. 

I’ll miss you, Target.  You have provided me with MANY UPON MANY retail therapy memories, and I look forward to the day that I can browse your aisles for everything that I didn’t need to get again.  Til we meet again…♥K

P.S. To show that there’s no hard feelings, I’m re-dedicating the song that Brian dedicated to his boyfriend today at spin today, to you.  Here it is, Always Be My Baby (the David Cook cover).


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