is it worth it?

I feel like I just got home from work and I’m already preparing to go back.  Does this ever end? 

Do what you love. Love what you do.  I’m not doing what I love, obviously.  I feel empty just thinking about going into work tomorrow.  How did it get to this point?  I’ve been working for my current employer for almost 18 months now, having moved to Chicago to work in the office back in late November.  That feels like forever ago.  I have no regrets coming here in the first place, but I’m starting to really regret staying there. 

This is my life.  Wake up at 5 am-ish.  Commute to work via 2 trains & 1 bus for a minimum of an hour.  8-8.5 hours at work- in a small, lifeless office (but with some wonderful people!)- where I stare at my computer screen for hours responding to email after email. Then commute back for another hour.  (Usual workout.) Then back home for dinner.  An hour or two of ‘me’ time/study time before bed- if I don’t pass out first.  Life in the big city, huh?  I know it could be a lot better than this, so why am I still doing it? 

Lately, as I pass 2 Starbucks and a Caribou on my way to the train station, I just want to plop on in there and spend the day writing.  Heck, I’d even work there too.  Ideally I’d love to be doing this and working as a Child Life Specialist.  One day…

Thanks for letting me vent.  My hope is that no one else has to wear these shoes of mine.  Do what you love.  Love what you do.

♥ K

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